Phantom Sayings, Jokes or Odd Comments from the Concom

     One can't go bidding for two conventions, and working on an event for three years without some shocking or hilarious things that come out from time to time. The comments and foibles are anonymous to protect the crazy. 

  • "When I ask Ireland if she likes Science Fiction, she plays a video of Duck Dodgers on her Ipad!! My Kid!"
  • "God had a great publicist"
  • New bedroom door lock means the WSFS pen collection is now protected from Ireland lol
  • "How do we say no to (ccxxcxx)?" - "Tell them that Google Translation says no."
  • Booking flights for guests of honor - airline asks "what is their date of birth" (Kate replies) "Its impolite to ask that." oops
  • Looks in the kitchen and sees fresh cinnamon rolls- "Honey, we need to have a talk about you bringing crack in the house"
  • Con chair in need of personal assistant who doesn't mind crazy to sort me out! 6 months to go!!
  • We got him for 30% off at
  • Good Job Airline! way to scare me by sending me email that its time to check in for a flight tomorrow- Panic anyone?
  • Brain cramp - I've lost a document grrr I so need a con secretary
  • My team is so wonderful I had personal issues, and still they got things done and got memberships at the same time!
  • Until after August 2019 all prophets please stay away from me.
  • The Borg checked us out for Assimilation at Fanx Booth #400  09/2018
  • My daughter has found the safety dance song from the 80s should we put it in the training videos for the convention? 
  • "I found it!! The bottom of my email boxes DOES exist"
  • Thank you to everyone who helped get Ireland a program and iPad to use Diane Osborne, Q Fortier and Rick Kovalcik. It works!!
  • "Why are you stopping presupports on August 18th?" (The NASFiC Vote was finalized and counted 08/18/2018 LOL)
  • Only you can prevent your brain on con tasks
  • "Close enough. I'm a pumpkin Charlie Brown"
  • Keep Calm and Avada Kadavra 
  • If I go offline it's because Thor is mad at me
  • That explains where most my committee went, they all play pokemon go
  • Went to put gas in the tank and found out word of the day is pedantic. My committee knows why it's hilarious.
  • We know nothink!!!
  • He called me a bastard... I like him already. 
  • What is this?  Sesame Street 102? 
  • Costumers are not good editors
  • Why are you people so moody?  Because it's that time of the millennium 
  • I'm being tailed by a spaghetti shark
  • Would it be wrong if I was to start my email off with, "Dear A**hat"?
  • Anti insanity insurance for the whole committee 
  • Can Howitzer lose sushi points by proxy?
  • "What is that sound?"  "I'm spanking my bacon." (Literally cooking a meal)
  • Ben can you come here and cut up my heart?
  • It is thicker than my finger is wide
  • You need something strong like a mallet to break my heart
  • You can't explain her brain in a single sentence.
  • I just got a courtesy block for thirty rooms at the Best Western in three minutes flat... I must be really that good.
  • Person One: "If they all had brains, they would be dangerous."
    Person Two: "Thankfully they don't."
  • If someone is a solo panelist, would they be able to moderate themselves?
  • Dog's probably smarter...and better at Kung Fu!!
  • "Howitzer is whining."  "I'm channeling my inner [name redacted]."
  • Don't Mind Me...Just GoH'ing Around in Circles.
  • Kate can't come to the phone right now, because she is tied up in a three way at the moment.  (The "three way" was a conference call on Google Hangouts)
  • Con Chair showing signs of Con Chair confusion. Typical, at T-90 days to the event horizon. 
  • I think the Con Chair is actually Ultron, because she keeps beating me by one second.
  • I titled the document I'm sending as "Howitzer's back end."
  • Person 1: Their seats should be with the black box.
    Person 2: Why the black box?
    Person 1: Because when the plane crashes, the black box is the first thing they look for.
    Person 2: You're horrible!!!
    Person 1: You're welcome.  :)
  • Just when I thought I wasn't going to be stupid and pedantic...I was being stupid and pedantic.
  • I officially lost my pet...stupid goblins.
  • Do you think that they are really that stupid?  Wait...let me rephrase that
  • It's a good thing that I'm in charge of the foibles, because I almost said something that would have been put on the list
  • Kate: You're going to hear the Wiggles in the background.
    Howitzer: Seriously?  I'm pretty sure that prisoners of war are treated way better than this.
  • Of course I have to butter you that you have buns.
  • Howitzer quit sending me foibles!!!!!
  • Kate (talking to one of the hotels on the phone): I'm sorry.
    Howitzer: You're more Canadian than I am.
    Kate: Shut up Howitzer!!!!
  • Since the current version of the Ops manual is 3.11, does that mean the next version will be Ops 95?
  • Kate: "We have a new volunteer application."
    Howitzer: "Are they from [State redacted]? What do they want in exchange?"
  • "I'm pretty flexible...Ouch!!"
  • My hubby has a bad day, and I get the comfort food.
  • Caller on phone:  Howitzer...I figured that you would be the one to Spikecon going to have a blood drive?
    Howitzer: I know for a fact that there will be one, because I'm the one who is the coordinator/liaison for the blood drive
  • No Howitzer...we *ARE NOT* putting "If you are happy with your schedule and you know it...clap your hands" in the panelists itinerary.
  • Howitzer: "Safari so good?"
    Michael Goodwin: "Shut up Howitzer!!!"
  • Howitzer: "One second...I'm not near my computer at the moment."
    Kate: "No problems...I'm not near my brain at the moment."